What is Rimming? A Simple Beginner's Guide with Tips & Techniques

Back view of man and woman holding each others butts

 

 

You probably find yourself here because you’re stumped as to what the term “rimming” means. Or, if you already know, you’re curious how you go about it.

 

Rimming (aka. Tossing Salad) is when one partner orally stimulates another’s anus.

 

Aka. Eating ass.

 

No, wait! Don’t run away!

 

If you’re new to the concept, you’re probably grossed out just thinking about it. However, I promise it’s nowhere near as bad as you think it is. In fact, it can be quite pleasurable.

 

Let’s look at what you need to do to prepare and some simple techniques to elevate you to the pro level.

 

 

CLEAN YOUR STARFISH WELL


 

This will be the make or break of a pleasant experience, and it all starts with planning.

 

Bar of blue, foamy soapIf you think you’re going to get lucky in some way, clean yourself ahead of time – and do it well. Jump in the shower and give your ass and hole a thorough wash.

 

And I don’t mean a quick lather – spend some serious time getting things squeaky clean. There are anal cleansing gels on the market too.

 

Another possibility is extending foreplay to the shower and doing it when your partner is with you.

 

Keep antibacterial baby wipes close by for a last-minute wipe down. These are also essential if you don’t think you can get to a shower beforehand – because, trust me, a simple toilet paper wipe will NOT be good enough.

 

Anal cleansing gels are a thing. Learn more here:

A Brutally Honest Review of SATU Lab's Anal 'Cleaning Gel

 

 

LANDSCAPE THE SECONDARY GARDEN


 

There’s already lots of talk about trimming the forward hedges, but if rimming is on the table, you might want to give those bum hairs a shave. Hairs tend to grab onto unpleasant things and be rather rough on the tongue.

 

You don’t have to wax or bleach anything. It’s just good manners to keep the hairs under control.

 

 

PRACTICE SAFE SEX


 

Salad being tossedYes, there is a bigger chance of bacteria being present, but there’s also the risk of STIs as well. This can either be from feces or blood in the anus (for example if there’s been any rough anal play ahead of time).

 

Not to mention if there are any open sores or swollen gums (in the “giver’s” mouth). This is one reason it’s suggested you don’t brush your teeth right after. Instead, wash with mouthwash etc. and then gently brush.

 

EXAMPLE: Herpes, Chlamydia, Hepatitis A, Salmonella, Giardia, Amoebas, or Shigella.

 

All of this is EASILY solved by using a dental dam or cutting open a condom and using the lubricated side against the rimming receiver.

 

Another suggestion I came across was cutting open a latex medical glove but leaving one of the fingers intact – essentially creating a dental damn with a tongue sleeve.

 

WARNING: Some people are allergic to latex. Check first or have the non-latex versions available. And while some people would suggest using plastic wrap, I do NOT. It’s not made the same as dental dams or condoms and has a higher risk of STI transference.

 

 

OTHER CONSIDERATIONS


 

Aside from keeping things clean, you should consider what your digestion is like that day. Having the “runs” or excessive gas can ruin things in ways we don’t want to imagine.

 

If things are suspect in the tummy department, wait for another day. Or, if gas is the issue, there are pills to take care of it or foods that produce fewer toots.

 

 

CHOOSING THE RIGHT POSITIONS


 

Cyanide and Happiness comic about rimming, aka annalingusThere’s no actual “right” position, just ones that make things easier.

 

Doggy style will open things up nicely, but they won’t be able to relax as easily because they are propping themselves up. Body wedges/pillows help to solve this issue.

 

Laying on the back with your legs tucked against your chest works too. Prop a pillow under your hips to make the area more accessible (and be kinder on your partner’s neck).

 

Riding their face is also another fine choice. Just make sure you don’t smother them.

 

 

HAVE A TECHNIQUE


              

This doesn’t mean you have to put on a performance – only making sure you don’t skip to just sticking your tongue in.

 

BEFORE GOING IN

 

  • Make sure your partner is comfortable and relaxed
  • Kiss along their thighs and other sensitive areas

 

 

GENTLY TEASE THEIR STARFISH

 

  • Use your breath to warm things up or cool things off
  • Draw half circles with your tongue
  • Make little swirls or gently fondle around the outside
  • Give tiny nibbles (not bites!)
  • Try a wand or other vibrator

 

 

Want some sex toy suggestions to use while rimming?

Domi – A Super Powerful Mini Wand

 

 

GETTING HOTTER & HEAVIER

 

  • Only when they are supremely worked up should you start inserting your tongue 
  • Short strokes, long ones, mixing it up, heavying licking etc.
  • This is also when you can insert a finger (if they want) and work a man’s p-spot.
  • Make sure you use lube if anything is going inside anywhere.

 

 

Not all lubes are created equal. Learn how in this article:

The BIG Lube Guide – Everything You Need to Know About the Slick Stuff

 

 

NOTE: Don’t ignore the rest of the body. If your partner’s a woman, play with her lower-lips etc. If it’s a man (and his erection allows) give him some sensual strokes or play with his balls.

 

Also, make sure you come up for air. Honestly, certain positions make it hard to breathe.

 

 

ISN’T IT JUST FOR GAY PEOPLE?


 

Nope. Not at all.

 

The nerve endings around the anus are the same whether you’re gay, straight, bi, any other sexual identity, male, or female. Granted there’s the stereotype that gay people enjoy it (for obvious reasons), and it’s lead to some discrimination, however, anyone can enjoy it.

 

And, as long as you’re with a trusted partner and use practice safer sex, it can be a great addition to your sex toolbox!

 

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

 

Do you have any other rimming techniques? Share in the comments.

 

Have a great day!

Robyn

 

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Comments (9)

  1. John says:

    Agreed, Robyn, rimming is a great addition to love making! Once my wife became comfortable with me rimming her it has given her (and me!) many moments of pleasure. Also, I enjoy kissing my wife's starfish, which really tells her how much I love her.

    1. Matt to John says:

      ditto!!!

  2. Mark says:

    I taught my wife how to enjoy her perfect starfish eaten I have always enjoyed kissing females fish but she makes me enjoy her buffet inside and out

  3. His everything says:

    I love rimming my man but it took him awhile to allow me to do so and even now it's not as often as I'd like it to be.

    1. matt to His everything says:

      yea my girlfriend wants to use pop rocks on my ass which i still find kinda uncomfortable mainly because i feel like mine is not visually appealing like hers. with all the hair. which i shave but still. im gonna do her first but does he enjoy it now, i know i can. just need to be comfortable.

  4. Phil says:

    My woman loves for my tongue to explore her stafish and then loves a toy inside her twat and me deep inside her ass. We stay very clean and safe. E find new intense pleasures as we explore new positions and places to enjoy each other. This article is most informative also. Always had a curiosity.

  5. mickey says:

    i have a hot ts girlfriend.she introduced me to rimming..i love it its amazing i cant live with out it

  6. Tracu says:

    Very informative new to me.I have rectocle(sp)so trying to learn more about different sexual terms and positions.

  7. Anant says:

    I started rimming my wife nearly a decade after marriage even though I had always been fascinated by the butt. She is also pretty comfortable with me going down her backside now and I actually spend way more time licking her ass these days than her pussy... :-)

  8. Matt says:

    i love eating my girls perfect as well as her pussy. getting her off gets me off. which she just loves about me. she finally is becoming comfortable with ass play, her friend recommended pop rocks is an intense pleasure. she wants to eat mine as well, still not into her doing me but open to it.

  9. Wendell says:

    I had a lady Friend Rim me one day and it felt Oh So Good and it’s very sensitive in that area and very pleasurable. I now rim as well to return the favor of pleasure.

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