Safety Guide 101 – Anal Play with Large Sex Toys

If your bum is just a beginner, and anything bigger than a finger makes you run away screaming, this guide is not for you … well unless you are someone who secretly hopes for a bright future involving large anal toys.

Whether curiosity or guidance, here is everything you need to know about anal play with large objects (and the accompanying stretching you’ll have to do.


The main thing to know about this guide is that, although we will be looking at similar concepts, it’s not meant for people with zero anal play experience. It’s meant for those who want to get into stuff with more length and/or girth. Say, for example, fisting or larger than average dildos.

Those past the beginner stage should already know how to relax their bodies/minds and experience comfortable, pleasurable penetration in some way.


If you have your eye on those BIG BOY TOYS sitting along the sex shop shelves, know this … it’s going to take you a while to get there. The main approach is going slow. Similar to first-time anal experiences, you’ll have to increase toy size and, therefore, stretch … gradually. It’s a marathon, not a race. The standard “anal trainers” won’t do you much good, so you’ll have to plan your shopping and toys accordingly.

Why is this crucial?



Ass play can be for anyone. However, we often see porn with women easily shoving wine bottles or other enormous objects in there – after all, a whole baby can come out of there. The thing is, vaginas are meant to stretch and then go back to normal … the bum isn’t designed that way – at least not for the amount of expansion you’re probably hoping for.

When the ass stretches, you can create micro-tears. And when you create micros tears and push the stretch even further, those tears expand – making it easier for infections and other bad things to happen.


Aside from just tearing the inner skin/membrane (which is delicate), and the possible resulting infections, you have to keep in mind several other things…

SEXUAL INFECTIONS – If you partake in unprotected sex after pushing your anal boundaries, those tears increase the risk of infection through the roof.

INCONTINENCE – If you stretch too much too often, there is a chance that your anus might not settle back down into its correct or original size. This could result in not being able to control bowel movements in various degrees. The solution? Enjoy anal stretching and large toy insertion, but not too often. Let your body re-adjust before diving in again.

PAIN & PUNCTURES – Aggressive stretching and/or penetrations will result in pain and could possibly cause something large than a micro tear – it could puncture through the membrane into other parts of the body (depending on the design of the toy, etc.)

IRRITATIONS & RASHES – This comes from using unsafe materials and/or not putting condoms over your toys when you play.


Body-safe materials include silicone, glass, ABS plastic, sealed wood, and medical-grade stainless steel. Anything else will be porous and will hold on to bacteria no matter how hard you try to clean them. This comes at a downside – many of those materials are not flexible or squishy, which some people prefer or even need during large toy play. Silicone will give you the most flexibility.

There is TPE/TPR rubber.

The upside? It’s softer. The downside? It’s quite porous. If you REALLY are determined to play with this material, put a condom over it!

Anything other than that, avoid it. The rest run the risk of having unsafe ingredients that could cause rashes, allergic reactions, or worse. The best example is Jelly – stay the [email protected] away from it.

Also, make sure you wash your toys BEFORE AND AFTER each use. No exceptions.


Finally, and the other huge key to a happy anal session is lube. Normally, with any anal play, you’ll be using a lot of lube. But with large toys or fisting etc., you’ll need MORE … like A LOT more. Tubs more.

It’s also a bit of a conundrum…

  • Water-based is the safest for toys, but it absorbs into the body faster – which means you’ll have to take the toy out and reapply far more often (which might not be pleasurable for the receiver).
  • Silicone will go much further but it cannot, repeat, CANNOT be used with silicone toys. Even the ones that are meant specifically for anal play.
  • Oil-based is the magic potion for advanced anal play. I’ve seen sex shops sell Crisco lard as a lube (which is okay for the ass, not the vagina, so don’t go getting the wrong idea).
  • I’ve also seen powders that you add water to that creates a sort of slime, which is also another ideal product for these sessions. But I haven’t used them so I don’t know how they affect toys.

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