Semen Smuggling – Guys Got Arrested For Sneaking In Swimmers

Smuggling drugs, sneaking smokes, stashing art – any of these acts wouldn’t raise even a fraction of an eyebrow if they made it into the news.

But semen?

Specifically Danish pig semen.

Two Australian men were caught and convicted for bringing loads of, well … loads … over the border to bulk their pork business. How did they smuggle the gooey goods, you wonder?

Shampoo bottles.

Yep, those Head and Shoulders bottles got a bit of extra “head.”

But, WHY, you ask?

Apparently, the Danish pigs are better breeders or more fertile or something. The end goal was clear though, the new pig DNA was supposed to give them an edge in the pork market.

As if things weren’t weird enough just with THOSE details, Henning Laue (production manager) and Torben Soerensen (managing director) of GD Pork said they were “influenced by ‘persuasive’ investors” – like something out of the Godfather or an organized crime ring.

Here’s the actual except…

ABC reports that Soerensen’s lawyer said his activity was “stupid,” and he called Soerensen the “front man” of a plot overseen by Danish kingpins, who were large investors in Sorensen’s parent company, Pork Australia ApS, which is based in Denmark.

Despite the giggle-inducing idea of bringing in pig cream, the higher authorities are super pissed. For one thing, the country is trying to keep out African Swine Flu as well as foot and mouth disease. Also, the “secret advantage” doesn’t sit well with those in charge.

“GD Pork imported the semen illegally in an attempt to get an unfair advantage over its competitors, through new genetics,” Australia federal agriculture minister Bridget McKenzie told the Guardian. “This case shows a disturbing disregard for the laws that protect the livelihoods of Australia’s 2,700 pork producers.”

The end result?

Soerensen got three years in prison and Laue got two years for their “special” semen dealings.

. . . . . . . . . . . . .

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Thoughts on all this craziness? Share in the comments!

Have a giggly day,

Robyn

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