The French have a long-standing reputation for being sexy, stylish, and effortlessly seductive, so it’s fitting that one of the most infamous sex positions happens to resemble their most famous landmark.
Equal parts playful and provocative, the Eiffel Tower sex position has earned a reputation in pop culture as bold, outrageous, and perhaps even a little taboo. But it isn’t just locker-room fantasy fodder. Done right, it can be a fun and satisfying experience for any trio, regardless of gender or orientation.
Ready to turn your ménage à trois into a true pièce de résistance? In this guide, you’ll learn:
- What it actually involves and how to set it up.
- Safety basics to keep everyone comfortable and respected.
- Variations for different body types, dynamics, and desires.
- Tips and tricks to make the Eiffel Tower as pleasurable as it is provocative.
Table of Contents
- What Is the Eiffel Tower Sex Position?
- Why People Love It
- How To Do the Eiffel Tower Sex Position: Step-by-Step Guide
- Safety, Comfort & Consent Tips
- Variations of the Eiffel Tower Sex Position
- Common Challenges & How to Solve Them
- Final Thoughts on the Eiffel Tower Sex Position
What Is the Eiffel Tower Sex Position?
Picture this: one partner is on all fours in the middle, giving oral sex to a standing partner in front of them, while being penetrated from behind by another standing partner. Then comes the flourish—the two standing partners reach over the centre partner to high-five, creating the “tower” shape that gives this position its name.
It’s a threesome position that’s as much about energy and playfulness as it is about mechanics. While the image often gets played for laughs in pop culture, it can be a genuinely fun and intimate experience when approached with respect and creativity.
The Classic Setup
- The centre partner is usually on all fours, facing one partner and backing into the other.
- One flanker receives oral sex, while the other penetrates vaginally or anally.
- Hands come together overhead for the signature high-five. This isn’t required, but it’s the part that makes the “Eiffel Tower” distinct.
- Adaptable to any genders and orientations: penetration may be vaginal, anal, or even toy-assisted, depending on preferences.
Eiffel Tower vs. Spit Roast
Think of the Eiffel Tower as the spit roast’s cheekier cousin; it’s got the same mechanics, but with an added wink.
- Spit Roast: A very similar arrangement with oral at the front and penetration at the back, but without the high-five. It’s all action, less theatre.
- Eiffel Tower: Adds the lighthearted, cheeky element of connection between the two flankers. This shared gesture can also symbolise teamwork and make the moment more light-hearted.
Why People Love It
Part of the Eiffel Tower’s appeal is that it’s not your everyday position; it’s novel, playful, and just a little outrageous. Trying it feels like breaking out of routine and stepping into something you’ve probably joked about with friends or seen referenced in pop culture. That sense of silliness mixed with boldness can create a lighthearted, “we’re really doing this” energy that sets the tone for fun.
Power Play and Camaraderie
Clinical psychologist and sex therapist Marianne Brandon, Ph.D., notes that power dynamics in sex, such as dominance or submission, are a primal and instinctive urge. “Power play is a part of all primate sex; really all mammalian sex…there is a dominant partner who ensures that sex happens, and a receptive partner who allows sex.”
The Eiffel Tower sex position brings a lot of these psychological elements into play:
- Depending on your dynamic, the centre partner might feel deliciously submissive, fully taken and attended to.
- The flankers can share in a sense of dominance, or flip it into playful teamwork with the high-five.
- For established couples bringing in a third, it can also serve as a bonding moment. Shared laughter and intimacy soften what might otherwise feel intimidating.
Physical Stimulation for All
One of the reasons the Eiffel Tower has such staying power is that it offers different layers of pleasure for everyone involved. The centre partner often experiences the most intense sensations, combining penetration with oral sex. Depending on anatomy, this can mean simultaneous G-spot/prostate and clitoral/penile stimulation, which can quickly escalate intensity.
How To Do the Eiffel Tower Sex Position: Step-by-Step Guide
It might look a little theatrical in memes or porn clips, but setting up the Eiffel Tower in real life isn’t overly complicated. That said, it’s not usually an everyday go-to position, so it helps to think through a few details before diving in. A bit of prep means you’ll spend less time fumbling with pillows or angles and more time enjoying the moment.
1. Get the Space Ready
- Surface: A bed usually works best, but the edge of a sturdy sofa or a thick rug can do the trick, too. Just steer clear of hard floors unless you’ve padded things out with mats or cushions.
- Comfort kit: Have a few props handy, like pillows for knees and wrists, a folded towel for under the chest, plus water-based lube and tissues within easy reach.
- Protection & hygiene: Adding extra partners can mean more fun, but it also means doubling down on safe sex. Use condoms or other barriers, toy cleaner or mild soap, and fresh condoms on toys if sharing. Agree on who’s using what before you start.
- Quick chat: Spend a couple of minutes checking in on boundaries, safe words, who’s setting the pace, and where everyone likes to finish. A short talk up front saves a lot of guesswork later.
Check out our guide on Secrets to a Successful Threesome for more tips on creating the right atmosphere.
2. Position Each Partner
- Centre partner
- Start on all fours. Hands under shoulders, knees under hips.
- Cushion knees and wrists. A pillow under the chest can reduce neck strain.
- Find a comfortable head height for oral. If the front partner is standing, you may want to be on a low bed or thick rug.
- Rear partner
- Stand or kneel behind the centre partner. Line up comfortably.
- Enter vaginally or anally, or use a strap-on. Start shallow; build depth once everyone’s settled.
- Hold the hips or the top of the thighs for control. Keep your stance stable.
- Front partner
- Stand or kneel in front of the centre partner for oral. Adjust your stance so it’s easy to stay balanced.
- Guide gently with hands to the head, shoulders, or hips if invited. Stay responsive to cues.
Flow: Begin slowly. The rear partner sets a comfortable rhythm, while the front partner mirrors with gentle thrusts or stillness. The centre partner can tap a thigh or squeeze a wrist to signal “slower”, “softer”, or “pause”.
3. Add the “Tower” Touch
The move that makes this setup “the Eiffel Tower” is the optional high-five between the two flankers. It’s a playful moment of camaraderie, not a must-do. If a high-five feels too goofy, even eye contact or a small touch between the two can add the same sense of connection.
4. Adjust for Comfort
- Height differences:
- Put the centre partner on a pillow stack or wedge to lift their mouth and lower their hips.
- The front partner kneels if they’re much taller; the rear partner stands on the floor while the centre partner kneels on the bed for better angles.
- Joint care:
- Knees aching? Switch to an “upside-down” variation with the centre partner on their back near the bed edge.
- Wrist pressure? Make fists or use yoga blocks under the hands.
Every trio brings different bodies, heights, and preferences into the mix, so the section below dives into more detail about Variations of the Eiffel Tower Sex Position designed to keep everyone comfortable and maximise pleasure.
Safety, Comfort & Consent Tips
The Eiffel Tower may look like a piece of cake in porn, but this is the real world and it works best when everyone feels safe and relaxed. A little preparation makes the difference between awkward fumbling and an experience you’ll want to repeat.
Talk Before You Try It
Like any threesome activity, a quick check-in beforehand goes a long way. Agree on who’s doing what, which acts are welcome, and what’s off-limits. You don’t need a boardroom meeting, just a relaxed chat about boundaries and expectations. Having a safe word or signal is also smart, so anyone can call for a pause if things feel off.
- Discuss comfort zones (penetration types, toys, roles).
- Agree on how to stop or switch things up if needed.
💡 Pro tip: Have this conversation outside the bedroom first. It’s easier to be honest without the heat of the moment.
Protection & Safe Practices
Threesomes introduce extra moving parts, so safety should be part of the plan. Condoms and lube are your best friends here. Use fresh condoms if you switch from oral to penetration, or if the same partner changes orifices. A big bottle of lube within reach, like Lovense’s water-based Personal Lubricant Jelly, keeps things comfortable.
- Use condoms or dental dams if you’re not fluid-bonded.
- Make sure contraception/STI prevention is sorted before play.
- Change condoms between partners or positions to avoid cross-contamination.
Keep Communicating During Play
Even with the best planning, you’ll need mid-play adjustments. The rear partner can check in with a quick, “This pace okay?” The centre partner can tap or shift to guide things without breaking the mood. The front partner should keep an eye on body language, too, since oral angles can feel great or awkward depending on small tweaks.
Variations of the Eiffel Tower Sex Position
From tweaks that ease pressure on the knees to ways of tailoring the position for different bodies, genders, and dynamics, there are plenty of ways to make this threesome classic work for you. Below are some creative twists and practical adaptations.
Classic Twists on the Eiffel Tower
If you like the idea but want something more comfortable, or just want to switch up the angle, these variations can help:
- Knee-Friendly / Upside-Down Tower: Instead of being on all fours, the receiving partner lies on their back while one partner straddles their chest and the other penetrates from below. Great for those with knee sensitivity.
- Standing Version: Both flankers stand, and the receiver supports themselves against a wall, desk, or bed edge. This adds stability and takes pressure off joints.
- Furniture-Assisted Tower: Beds, sofas, or sturdy tables can raise the receiver to the perfect height. This also makes it easier to adjust angles for pleasure.
- “Room for Four”: A playful upgrade where a fourth joins in with hands, toys, or oral attention to whoever isn’t actively engaged at the moment.
Get Creative with Toys
The Eiffel Tower doesn’t have to rely on just three bodies, and adding toys can take the experience from exciting to unforgettable. Whether it’s boosting sensation for the person in the middle or creating a “stand-in” when a third partner isn’t around, the right toy can open up endless possibilities.
Lush 4: App-Controlled G-Spot Egg Vibrator
A wearable G-spot vibrator that delivers powerful internal vibrations without getting in the way of the position itself. Slip it in before play, and the receiver can enjoy deep stimulation while focusing on oral or penetration. The best part? It’s app-controlled, so one of the partners (or even someone removed from the position) can take control of the intensity for surprise peaks and teasing build-ups.
Mission 2: Vibrating Suction Cup Dildo
Perfect for when a third partner isn’t available, this suction-cup dildo offers touch-sensitive vibrations that respond in real time to movement and pressure. Its adjustable angles mean you can experiment with different positions, making it a versatile “flanker” for any Eiffel Tower setup. With strong, customisable patterns, it can mimic the feel of a live partner and keep the dynamic playful and satisfying.
Gender Mix Variations (MMF, FFM, MMM, FFF)
Different gender combinations can shape the way the Eiffel Tower feels and who gets what kind of stimulation.
- MMF: The partner in the middle may enjoy double stimulation (oral + penetration), while the flankers can swap dominance and mutual bonding with the high-five moment.
- FFM: Allows for more clitoral and G-spot focus. Strap-ons or toys make it versatile, and the receiver can get intense double attention.
- MMM: Often prostate-focused for the receiver, with potential for strong stimulation and power dynamics between the flankers.
- FFF: Emphasises intimacy, oral play, and toys, with lots of freedom to experiment without pressure from traditional gendered roles.
Queer Dynamics and Relationship Roles
Not every Eiffel Tower happens between strangers at a party. In queer dynamics, especially when a primary couple invites a third, relationship roles can shape how the position plays out. Who takes the centre? Who initiates the high-five? Is the focus on making one person feel adored, or on balancing pleasure across all three?
- Established power roles (dominant/submissive, giver/receiver) may influence how the position feels.
- Communication becomes especially important to ensure that the “third” doesn’t feel like an outsider, and that pleasure—not just spectacle—is shared.
Common Challenges & How to Solve Them
Even with the thrill of trying something new, the Eiffel Tower can bring a few practical (and emotional) hurdles. Here’s how to smooth them out so everyone stays comfortable and connected.
Size & Height Adjustments
Height differences or body shapes don’t have to be deal-breakers. A few tweaks can make things flow more easily:
- Level the playing field: Use pillows, wedges, or sturdy furniture edges to bring partners into alignment.
- Comfort for the centre partner: A soft, slightly raised surface (like a bed topper) helps if belly pressure becomes an issue.
- Closing the gap: If a flanker struggles with reach, toys like strap-ons or suction-cup dildos can bridge the distance.
Staying in Sync
Three people moving at once isn’t always intuitive. Some stumble over rhythm at first, but you can fix that with:
- Alternating thrusts so the centre partner isn’t overwhelmed.
- Syncing up if intensity is the goal.
- Non-verbal cues like squeezing a thigh, eye contact, or shifting hand placement to keep everyone aligned without breaking the flow.
Balancing Pleasure Across Roles
Depending on the gender mix, the focus of stimulation can naturally tilt one way. For example, MMF setups often emphasise penetration, while FFM tends to highlight clitoral and vaginal pleasure. To balance things out, consider role-swapping mid-session, or add toys (like a bullet vibrator, stroker, or plug) so every participant gets their fair share of attention.
Navigating Relationship Dynamics
Sometimes the hardest part isn’t physical at all. If a couple is adding a third, insecurities can creep in. The key is reassurance and clarity:
- Talk upfront about power roles—who leads, who receives, whether it’s playful or serious.
- Check in during play to make sure no one feels sidelined.
- Reassure afterwards so the third feels included and the couple feels secure.
Final Thoughts on the Eiffel Tower Sex Position
Equal parts playful and provocative, the Eiffel Tower has earned its place in pop culture—and for good reason. When approached with communication, comfort, and consent, it can become a truly memorable experience for threesomes of any gender mix or dynamic.
So if you’re curious, talk it through, prepare your setup, and let yourselves enjoy both the physical thrill and the lighthearted absurdity that makes the Eiffel Tower so iconic.
Ready to explore even more ways to connect? Check out Lovense’s range of best-selling sex toys to take this position (and many others) to new heights.
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