How to French Kiss – 20 Simple, Practical, and Vital Tips

Close up of lips in red lipstick, two women kissing

 

Fresh and new or long-term and familiar – a great kiss is the cornerstone of connection.

 

And, while a normal kiss is essential to master, a French kiss could be the difference between a happy, melting partner or a retreating one.

 

Here are some easy tips to up your game.

 

 

1. GOOD HYGIENE


 

Being a triple black-diamond kisser starts here.

 

Granted, there are people who don’t need or care about minty freshness, but no one wants to lean in and savor something that tastes like an ashtray or three-day-old latte.

 

The remedy is as simple as making sure those teeth are brushed and flossed on a regular basis (which we should be doing anyway). Toss in some mouthwash as well.

 

You might be thinking “well, duh”, but I have been in a handful of situations where someone wanted a smooch and all I could do was uncontrollably recoil and gag.

 

 

2. SCRUB THOSE LIPS


 

And yes, we're going to spend a few points on stuff that happens WAY before the kiss.

 

After you brush your teeth, give your lips a light exfoliation. It will leave the skin soft and inviting - because rough, cracked lips are not pleasnt to press against. 

 

Some use cinnamon powder or essential oil to plump them up. Warning, it can sting a little.

 

 

3. FIRST DATE FOOD


 

Romantic mand and woman in a red carThings like garlic, onions, cheese, spicy things, coffee, tuna, sugar, tomatoes etc. will contribute to bad breath.

 

Conversely, fresh herbs (that parsley garnish on your dinner), ginger, melons, green tea, and water will do good things.

 

 

4. ADD A LITTLE LIP BALM


 

For guys or girls, this should be in your bag anyway, especially if you live in drier climates.

 

5. STICKY GLOSS AND LIPSTICK


 

Ladies, we know we look great wearing it, but it’s can get so messy, more so with lip gloss – hence the lip balm suggestion.

 

 

6. BUILD ANTICIPATION


 

Get them revved up by lightly breathing warm air across wherever you’re going to kiss. It adds more sensations and increases excitement.  

 

You can take it a step further and build anticipation long before - body language, the "I have to kiss you now" look, gentle touching etc.

 

 

7. START OFF SLOW


 

This goes hand-in-hand with #8.

 

You’ll find this is especially important for a first kiss, as you tread waters and find out what they like.

 

I know the rules change (somewhat) after you’ve been in a relationship for a while, but even your long time S.O. doesn’t want to have a mouth sprint every make out session.

 

 

8. GRAZING IS GREAT


 

Man kissing his girlfriend on the foreheadGently grazing your partner’s lips with yours (without actually kissing) can be a great way to start off. Don't forget the corner where the lips meet or along the jawline.

 

The result is usually bolts of electricity coursing up their jaw. 

 

 

9. MIRRORING & BODY LANGUAGE


 

Paying attention to what your partner does can clue you into what they like.

 

If they slip in a little tongue and reciprocate, it’s a good sign.

 

If they don’t, you might have moved to that step too fast.

 

 

10. TAKING THE LEAD


 

If they end up a rubbish kisser, you can take the lead and coax/show them how it’s done.

 

Some people advocate verbal communication if things get really bad, and I would tend to agree.

 

HOWEVER a first kiss is an especially intimate moment and people’s feelings and egos are laid bare, so it’s best to be careful and gentle – something like whispering, “Here, let me show you what I like.”

 

 

11. WHEN IT'S TIME TO USE THE TONGUE


 

A couple kissing int he middle of the street, holding red heart balloonsFinally, the French part of the kiss.

 

When you've got a good rhythm going, slowly tilt your head back (slightly) and open your mouth (just a little, not a gaping cave).

 

If your partner mirror's this movement, you can use the tip of your tongue to give them a little lip massage:

 

  • Circle your tongue around theirs
  • Run your tongue along their lips
  • Press your tongues against each other

 

 

12. DON'T PLUNGE THE TONGUE


 

Sticking your ridged tongue deep in someone’s mouth and swishing it around is NOT sexy.

 

I repeat, NOT sexy.

 

During some rough play? Ugh, maybe - depending on your partner. But straight down the throat, no.

 

The same thing goes for "swishing" or "flicking". GENTEL AND SENSUAL is the key.

 

 

13. GET IN SOME SUCKING ACTION


 

When you’re about to pull away, lightly suck on their lower lip. Don’t bite though.

 

NOTE: The pull-away doesn't mean you have to end the kiss.

 

 

14. DON'T FORGET YOUR HANDS


 

Man kissing his girlfriend on the noseIf it’s a romantic kiss, run your fingers through their hair or along their back/lower back, hold their neck, rest them on his chest, or grab the front of their shirt.

 

The rougher the kiss, the rougher the grab.

 

Using your nails is also a fun addition, just make sure it’s not too hard or you know your partner’s pain thresholds.

 

 

15. EXPLORE OTHER PLACES


 

There are plenty of sensitive areas besides the lips: the neck, forehead, ears, collarbone, jaw etc.

 

If I want to end a kiss on a cute note, I finish off with a tiny peck on the end of the nose.

 

 

16. FORGET HICKIES


 

A kiss on the neck? Okay. But going full Hover is not as sexy as people might think.

 

 

17. KEEP THE TEETH UNDER CONTROL


 

Try to avoid excess nibbling and biting (a little is okay if you're careful). It’s really not for everyone and can cause unwanted sensations.

 

Careful with rough kisses - the teeth can bang together. Ouch.

 

 

18. DON'T USE A CHECKLIST


 

Romantic couple kissing in the sunshineIf you’re running over everything you have to do while kissing, you’re not in the moment … and not really kissing them.

 

People can tell when you’re not all there.

 

 

Remember the “less is more” rule.

 

 

19. PDAs


 

They might not be into full public displays of affection, but a peck on the cheek, neck, fingers, or inside of the wrist is a sure win. 

 

 

20. HAVE CONFIDENCE & RELAX


 

With all these tricks up your sleeve, give your partner an air of confidence. Intense, passionate, or even caring stares and matching body language is sexy AF.

 

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

 

Any other kissing advice you want to add? Share in the comments!

 

Also, if you want more mouth-related articles, check these out:

 

 

Have a sexy day!

Robyn

 

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