{"id":271,"date":"2018-01-11T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2018-01-11T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blog.lovenselife.com\/uncategorized\/animal-sex"},"modified":"2026-02-26T09:06:02","modified_gmt":"2026-02-26T09:06:02","slug":"animal-sex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.lovense.com\/sex-blog\/how-to-have-sex\/sex-positivity\/animal-sex","title":{"rendered":"Kinky Animal Sex – 12 Creatures With Freaky Mating Rituals"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Many of us try to put a little spice into our bedrooms. However, some of these animals would give humans a run for our money (while a couple would probably be arrested).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s strangling, free love, blowjobs, electroshock, and more\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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GIRAFFES ARE INTO WATER SPORTS<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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For those who don\u2019t know, water sports = playing with urine.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

When the giraffe male finds a suitable female, he bends over, nudges her backside with his head \u2026 and drinks her urine.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While we\u2019re saying, \u201cEwww\u201d the chemicals he\u2019s tasting tell him whether she\u2019s in heat or not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But wait. It gets better.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

He\u2019ll follow the female around as she walks away from his ENORMOUS ERECTION. After some leg kicking and more following, she\u2019ll stand still long enough for him to mount \u2026 and ejaculate in seconds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

After, a few more ten-second-man maneuvers, he\u2019ll romp of for some male-on-male sex.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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HIPPOS ARE INTO SCAT<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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While we\u2019re on the topic of bathroom stuff, why not look at number two.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even humans have a thing about, \u201cthis is my space.\u201d We put signs up on our doors or create man-caves. The male hippo poos everywhere<\/strong> \u2026 and then flicks it with his tail to send it flying further and making his area bigger.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The female, in turn, shows her interest by raising her rear end and giving him her own \u201csubmissive dung shower\u201d and flicking it everywhere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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GARTER SNAKES ARE INTO GANGBANGS<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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And not only gangbangs, but lying while doing it…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When one female garter snake is ready to mate, watch out! Because a PILE of males will gather on top of her, all wanting to get in on that action. While male competition isn\u2019t anything surprising, some boy snakes will give off a similar scent as a female.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why would a dude pretend to be a girl while a bunch of other dudes are pressed against him?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are three theories. First, he\u2019s trying to trick the males into wasting sperm and avoiding aggression from dominant males. Second, they are doing it to be at the bottom of the pile and stay warm. Third, they\u2019re trying to protect themselves from other predators who like snatching and eating the boys on the top.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

FUN FACT:<\/strong><\/span> these mating balls get so big, that it’s become a huge tourist spectacle in some national parks.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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GRUNION FISH ARE INTO MASOCHISTIC BUKAKKE<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Being covered in sperm (in porn we call it bukkake \u2013 think like a pearl necklace but over the whole body) shouldn\u2019t be surprising for fish. After all that\u2019s how they all fertilize the laid eggs; by swimming over them and ejaculating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What makes the Grunion fish extreme is how the female swims up onto shore and buries themselves in the wet sand until the males can cover the area in white, gooey, baby-making juice \u2013 all the while not being able to breath \u2026 for hours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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LOBSTERS ROOFIE ROOFIE THEIR MATES<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Male lobsters are extremely<\/em> aggressive \u2013 with the alpha\/dominant male going into all the other lobster homes every night and kicking the crap out of them just to remind them who\u2019s boss.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The females apparently love<\/em> this \u201cmacho\u201d behavior. They also know that Mr. Lobster is more interested in being a dick than using it. So, she follows him home (in a totally non-stalker way) then proceeds to urinate<\/em> around him \u2026 sometimes for days.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The pheromone-laced urine calms the male until he\u2019s ready to get down to business. Another species that likes pee.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Oh, and porcupines too. They like the yellow stuff.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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FEMALE OCTOPUS WILL STRANGLE<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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A little auto-erotic asphyxiation, anyone?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In truth, it\u2019s less erotic and more dangerous. So dangerous, that males tend to try and mate with their \u201cpenis arm\u201d at as far a distance as possible<\/strong> \u2013 sometimes surprising her from behind and jumping on her head.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

All of this is to avoid her wrapping her tentacles around him and squeezing him to death.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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WALRUSES AND ELEPHANT SEALS DO IT ROUGH<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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It\u2019s all about domination and flexing your animal muscles. And both these species do it to the extreme.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There are no love bites here. Fights and full-on body brawls can deliver some lasting damage to all others around them \u2013 even to the point of death. Elephant seals even go as far as banging everything they can \u2013 from males to pregnant females to pups.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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FRUIT BATS GIVE FELATIO<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Scientists have found short-nosed fruit bats are one of the few species the get in on some of that mouth-to-genital action. In fact, for every 15 seconds of sex, the male bat will lick his lady for around 2.5 minutes, then wash, rinse, repeat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Even the females will jump into the 69-train, with the idea being they are either checking compatibility through tasting his pheromones\/chemicals, keeping him unavailable for other females, or just keeping him clean.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

BUPRESTED BEETLES BOTTLE SEX<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Okay, boys \u2026 we all know you\u2019ve at least used your hand, but what about a pocket pussy or Fleshlight?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

At least when humans use sex toys, we know it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The problem with this poor Australian beetle doesn\u2019t know the difference<\/strong> between a female and their brown, shiny shell, and the brown beer bottles tossed on the side of the road. The even bigger problem, is that the males seem to prefer the bottles (maybe because it\u2019s easier?) and will pile on one rather than the living option.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

On top of it all, OTHER creates have figured it out \u2013 for example, ants. They\u2019ll wait around these bottles until a horny male comes along and then pile on him and eat him. The result is an actual threat of extinction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Is it just me or does this sound like a parallel in the debate between humans and sex robots?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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HERMAPHRODITIC FENCING<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Ocean flatworms have both male and female parts. So how do they know who ends up carrying the kids?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They whip their penises out and have a good old-fashioned sword fight, complete with stabbing. The loser is the one to spend the extra energy reproducing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Similarly, sea slugs will have a similar battle. However, theirs involves trying to stab each other in the head and ejaculating \u2013 therefore making the loser think they are female. Ugh.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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BONOBOS PRACTICE FREE LOVE  <\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Get into a disagreement? Have sex. Want some food? Have sex. Want to be friends? Have sex.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Want sex? Have sex.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This \u201chumping solves all problems\u201d is no wonder why this primate family is one of the most peaceful in nature. Nearly everything they do involves some sort of sexual act<\/strong> \u2013 from tongue kissing to mutual masturbation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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DOLPHINS AND ELECTROSHOCK<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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We already know dolphins are ridiculously horny creatures \u2013 engaging in gay sex while young to establish friendships and sexual \u201cwing-men\u201d, keeping females away from other gangs until she is sexually ready, and having recreational sex to reduce stress.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The oddest fact is one way they masturbate (aside from down the bodies of decapitated fish \u2013 yes, there\u2019s a video of this) \u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

With eels.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yep. Live, writhing eels wrapped around their penis. And, rumor has it, sometimes electric eels.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

Want other weird, but can’t-stop-reading articles? Check out:<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Understanding Pimple Popping Fetish<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

History of Tentacle Porn<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Japanese Fetish Party – Department H Tokyo<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/div>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Many of us try to put a little spice into our bedrooms. However, some of these animals would give humans a run for our money…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3272,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[447,22,449],"tags":[179,180],"class_list":["post-271","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-how-to-have-sex","category-fun-weird","category-sex-positivity","tag-animals","tag-nature"],"yoast_head":"\nKinky Animal Sex - 12 Creatures With Freaky Mating Rituals - Lovense Sex Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Kinky animals and their weird mating habits. 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