OH HOW LITTLE DID WE KNOW<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n I was thrilled to get on the plane, but it was really my boyfriend\u2019s dream destination. And, since I had about as much idea of what to do as a five-year-old flying a fighter jet, he ended up in charge of 99% of the research and planning.<\/p>\n\n\n\n This is how we ended up at Department H.<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n In our minds, it was just another monthly to-do where kinks gathered and had fun.<\/p>\n\n\n\n However…<\/p>\n\n\n\n We somehow ignored the fact we were in Japan – home of maid cafes, raw horse meat, and Rabbit Island. We were like children at the Oscars – happy at the sparkly environment and high-energy vibes, but clueless as to what we were really taking part in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Lots of crossdressers and drag queens.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n The first thing we learned was that ticket prices were significantly<\/em> cheaper if you wore appropriate clothing<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We ran to the 10-story sex shop we had found in Akihabara a couple of days earlier and bought a few cheap accessories to throw on top of my leather dress and tried to disguise my boyfriend’s dark street clothes. Then, we jumped in a taxi and kept our fingers crossed it would be easy to find while wearing platform heels.<\/p>\n\n\n\n ARRIVING AT A DINGY BACKSTREET<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n The side street entrance was only easy to find because of the cue of the fabulously fashionable freaks<\/strong> (the location is seriously unassuming).<\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n There was tones of latex, a surprising amount of street clothes, and many large bags or backpacks stuffed with costumes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The couple behind us was changing under their jackets while the drag queen hosts walked up and down the crowd to make sure people didn\u2019t get preemptively nude(ish). <\/strong>The man and woman magically transformed – her into a mesh bodysuit, thong, and bright neon pink wig, he into a rubber butcher\u2019s apron with combat boots.<\/p>\n\n\n\n NOTE: <\/strong><\/span>Remember this couple, we will see them again later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Shortly after, a Japanese woman strutted down the street with her man dutifully following two steps behind. Both were dressed in what could only be described and white city chic.<\/p>\n\n\n\n She walked with an air of \u201cI\u2019m better than all of you, and you must worship me\u201d (and oh god how she primped, preened, and constantly puffed her hair. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n My boyfriend grinned and whispered to me, \u201cI know what you want to do to her.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n He either saw my expression or read my mind. Or both.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Three words…<\/p>\n\n\n\n Her. Naked. Cage.<\/p>\n\n\n\n GETTING INSIDE WAS … INTERESTING<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n When go-time came, the line surged forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tickets were checked \u2026 and so were passports<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We had (thankfully) read online that they were going to ask for them, but the butcher and neon-pink couple hadn\u2019t. It took a decent amount of begging to gain entry elevator which hauled the gaggles of eager guests to the next room.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Upstairs, the greeters included:<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n Not a bad start to the night.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Unfortunately, my man got tagged with a full-priced ticket because his clothes weren\u2019t up to par. Meh, we kind of expected it. When the formal taking of the tickets and stamping of hands was done, we were set free to explore the venue.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Holy shit, the place was huge <\/strong>– an entire theater, complete with an upper floor area\/balcony, \u00a0scuffed-up stage, and sofa seating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The decor had either been done 30 years ago, or a brocade monster threw up red, yellow, and brown over all the walls and upholstery <\/strong>then thought, “Hey, you know what would make <\/em>this? Dingy marble and wood slate accents.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was a visual assault on the eyes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was wonderful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tucked away in a corner was a place you could buy mixers – this is just one of the many things that makes this place unique…<\/p>\n\n\n\n It is completely (and encouraged) BYOB<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n They can\u2019t get licenses to sell liquor, so they just sell soft drinks and give out free ice to patrons. It\u2019s not <\/strong>encouraged, however, to get blind drunk at any fetish event, even this one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We grabbed seats at the front of the balcony and watched the others filter in. There was everything you could imagine…<\/p>\n\n\n\n Old Japanese men dressed in slapdash of women\u2019s attire, furry animal costumes, slutty uniforms, things that looked like fast food mascots who stand on the sidewalk, people covered head to toe in latex or rubber, cosplay, ball gowns, spandex, unidentifiable interpretive costumes, and a truckload of thongs or spank pants.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was quite literally \u201cwear whatever<\/em> the fuck you want<\/em>\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was Halloween on steroids,<\/strong> and I felt utterly naked. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n For all those times I had been the biggest BDSM dresser or costume enthusiast, I was now the novice being schooled by an entire hardcore crowd.<\/p>\n\n\n\n SOME NOTEWORTHY & MEMORABLE GUESTS<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n And this was just the guests.<\/p>\n\n\n\n We haven\u2019t even got to the vendors yet.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n If the visuals are too much for you, I understand.<\/p>\n\n\n\n I would suggest you turn back now because it\u2019s only going to get weirder.<\/p>\n\n\n\n THE PERFORMANCES!!<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n And, the coup de gras…<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n A girl wrapped in medical gauze with symbols in one hand and a mic in the other \u2013 singing in a Japanese monotone (comparable to an 80-year history teacher reading tax law while on Xanax<\/strong>) while her backup dancers did something that could only be described as \u201ca slow vogue mixed with Egyptian hieroglyphic poses\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n And the crowd LOVED IT. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n The entire front row was nothing but latex animals all dancing in sync<\/strong> \u2026 clearly, they had gone enough times to know the moves by heart and graduate to full-on groupie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My boyfriend was utterly entranced. \u201cLook at this. I\u2019m actually seeing this. It\u2019s amazing.\u201d And, like some scientist on the verge of a great discovery, observed the scene with interest that could only be described as \u201ctwo seconds away from joining the crowd.\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n It wasn\u2019t, however, enough to distract me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To our right was something far more fascinating.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A Japanese Shibari master (rope tying) was stringing up girls one by one to the poles, railings, or floor. <\/strong>There was a line of volunteers nearly begging for a turn (even I was tempted, but way too shy to even ask). Also, only a handful could partake in the experience \u2013 mostly because the roping was so detailed and careful.<\/p>\n\n\n\n My personal favorite was one woman whose fingers were bound (imagine a praying position with your hands together, but fingers spread and three knots holding each pair of fingers together).<\/p>\n\n\n\n Boyfriend loved the one tied to the railing with her legs spread wide <\/em>apart.<\/p>\n\n\n\n THE INEVITABLE MORON<\/strong><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n There was only one annoying, bullshit moment during the entire evening.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A couple of French guys came in (already on their way to being drunk) absolutely drooling over the scantily clad women surrounding them.<\/p>\n\n\n\n They were like a pair of pubescent boys who had stumbled on their mother\u2019s Sears catalog, discovered the undergarment section, and found out what a pair of boobs looked like.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And for some reason, their horny and inebriated state made them think they could go around touching bodies however they wanted without <\/em>asking or accepting \u201cno\u201d as an answer. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Remember the neon pink wig chick in the mesh body suit <\/strong>that was standing in line with us?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Well…<\/p>\n\n\n\n One of the guys started groping her. She yelled, backed away, and her butcher apron boyfriend immediately stepped in.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was at that point the entire section of the top floor started watching things \u2026 carefully \u2026 which should have been a cue for the two to back off.<\/p>\n\n\n\n But nope.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The offender slurred, \u201cIf I see a boobie, I will touch a boobie. You are her boyfriend. It\u2019s your job to protect her. Since you can\u2019t, I can touch her how I like.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Putting aside the fact he sounded like a moron saying \u201cboobie\u201d while trying to act tough, this is the cardinal rule you DO NOT break in any kind of these parties \u2026 hell, in any moment of life for that matter.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The friend that hadn\u2019t done the touching must have been slightly more sober, because he noticed that everyone was watching like pissed off vultures, especially a ridiculously muscular black guy who gave a very clear look of \u201cI\u2019m ready to jump in and beat the shit out of these guys.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n However…<\/p>\n\n\n\n Before any fights broke out, the drag queen staff had got wind of the ordeal and took control of the situation.<\/p>\n\n\n\n One of the few pictures I snapped that night. <\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n See the guy on the right – black clothes and a blonde wig?<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n This might sound like the least threatening thing ever \u2013 \u201cmen in ball gowns and makeup coming to break up a fight\u201d \u2013 but remember, one of them was built <\/em>and six feet tall WITHOUT his spiked high heels and poofy wig.<\/p>\n\n\n\n The entire thing put him at seven feet … easy. Add the three-inch, talon nails, and you have an entire arsenal of weapons.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Do not piss off something with spikes on their fingers!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n After some stern talking (and the guys backing off, but passively aggressive hanging out two feet from the couple they had been harassing, and then getting a final warning) the two were hauled off by some uber-serious bouncers.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Although, I would have loved to see the drag queens drag<\/em> him out.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n ARMPITS AND WHIPPED CREAM<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n The tension took a solid thirty minutes to disappear and people to find a way back to their comfort zones. Even I didn\u2019t really feel like getting freaky in any form after that. So, we sat back and watched our surroundings.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It only took 10 minutes for something else to happen…<\/p>\n\n\n\n One old Japanese man came up, smiled brightly, and (using body language) asked if he could smell my armpit.<\/p>\n\n\n\n After a couple of seconds of processing the request (and glancing at my boyfriend), I figured, \u201cHey, when in Rome\u2026\u201d.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n He took a long sniff and looked positively euphoric. I thought things were done, but after a minute, he scurried back up with a paper plate full of shaving cream and asked me to shove it in his face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n “Hey. Why not?”<\/em> I thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n It all ended with him quickly cleaning his face, proudly showing he had done a thorough job of it, then bowing and wandering away.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A night at Department H.<\/p>\n\n\n\n 10\/10 would go again.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . <\/p>\n\n\n\n SIDE NOTE:<\/strong><\/span> Many of the image credits go to\u00a0La Carmina<\/a>. I was too busy gaping at everything and only remembered to snap a few photos.<\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n Also, if you like Japanese-related articles, you might like these:<\/strong><\/span><\/span><\/p>\n\n\n\n Have you ever been to a crazy fetish event? Share in the comments!<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" We had already tried one fetish club during our Tokyo vacation (Deca Bar Z), and we thought we had seen the best oddball antics we would…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":3366,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[447,22],"tags":[61,73],"class_list":["post-198","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-how-to-have-sex","category-fun-weird","tag-fetish","tag-japan"],"yoast_head":"\n
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