It’s no surprise that the holiday season is a downright bitch for the adults that have to pull off being Santa – or just show up to their annual night of turkey and judgment.
Wanting to create the perfect day, as well as the strain on time and bank accounts, doesn’t make for a pleasant atmosphere for relationships.
In fact, while the 24th, 25th, 26th, and 31st have their own names, the first working Monday in January also has a special term – one dubbed by lawyers.
“Divorce Monday” it’s called.
It seems the holiday strain is worse than people realize.
So, here are a few tips – at least in relation to winter-time hanky panky – that might help keep your spark alive during Christmas.
Divide Holiday Chores
“Women usually bear a disproportionate amount of the mental load in relationships and take on roughly twice as much responsibility for child care.”
During Christmas, this imbalance gets even worse.
Instead of taking on every task, make sure that you and your partner split the list fairly – and not just in number but in intensity as well.
On top of that, try to buy your gifts throughout the year (if possible), so you can avoid last minute sprees or nailbiting for Amazon packages to arrive.
Next, let go of the ipcture-perfect image in your head. If your partner does a sloppy end fold with the wrapping paper, remember, the kids don’t care – they will rip it off quick anyways. The tree isn’t “just so?”, instead, take a moment to love the fact the kids are doing together and it’s their masterpiece. The same goes for cooking – make sure the older kids help out! And if there are no kids in the picture, don’t burn out over making a turkey Gordon Ramsey would be proud of.
Yes, I know this is a sex site, but stay with me here…
The main goal is to reduce as much stress as possible. Because stress is one of the biggest libido killers.
The dinner is a huge chunk of work during the 25th. If you can, cook and/or freeze as much as possible a couple days before. For example, most desserts will keep just fine for 24 hours. Stuffing can be bagged with all dry ingredients and broth added later. Instead of gourmet cranberry sauce, get the canned stuff. You get the picture.
Too Much Partying
There’s the office party, the uncle’s shindig, the second cousin’s holiday mixer, and if you have kids there are a million pageants or plays to see.
You don’t have to attend them all! And if there is booze, make sure to keep it to just a couple glasses – hangovers won’t help you in the bedroom. Bonus tip, beforehand you can designate someone to take care of the kids if the other is going to get hammered.
Bonus, bonus tip – schedule a date night to unwind and connect. Talk about what is overwhelming you and how your partner can help (and vice verssa). It’s not a time to argue – rather a time to support each other.
Okay, I have to be honest. I’m not one of these people who can NOT schedule sex. If I’m not in the mood, any sexual contact makes me internally go, “NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!! NO NO NO!” I have to be in the mood in the first place.
But if you ARE someone who can, then go ahead and set aside some kinky, sexy, romantic time with your partner. There doesn’t have to be candles and roses (your budget is stressed enough as it is), but be close to one another. If Aunt Elain calls up to complain she doesn’t want to bring Brussel sprouts again, just ignore the call.
Do you have any other Dos or Don’ts for a sexy Christmas? Share in the comments!