101 BDSM Humiliation & Degradation Ideas to Make Your Sub Squirm

Estimated reading time: 28 minutes

So, you’re curious about delving into the world of BDSM humiliation and degradation? Maybe you’re itching to try something fresh in the bedroom or are just looking to shake things up a bit. Well, you’ve landed on the right page! We’ve put together a massive list with a bunch of wicked ideas.

But it’s not just inspiration. This is also a comprehensive guide with terminology explanations, BDSM safety tips, useful videos, article links and so much more. So, grab a seat and get ready to dive into this deliciously twisted world. Oh. and if you want to jump straight to the ideas, click in the table of contents.

Exploring the Edges: Understanding BDSM Humiliation & Degradation


Latex clad dominatrix pouring milk into pet bown for submissive man
Credit: Source Unknown

Navigating the world of BDSM, where the lines between humiliation and degradation blur, is like walking through a complex maze of emotions and psychological twists. Imagine being asked to perform tasks that seem trivial, like kneeling to serve drinks at a party. For some, this might be a light-hearted part of roleplay, a bit of fun that adds spice to the evening. But, for others, it could feel like a step further, crossing into degradation by stripping away their sense of status or dignity.

Engaging in BDSM offers a unique chance to explore:

  • Personal limits and desires
  • The complex landscape of our psychological makeup
  • The dynamics of power and control

The setting of these BDSM scenes is also important.

It can change everything about how things are received and felt. In a relationship where trust and open communication are the bedrock, diving into humiliation and degradation can actually bring people closer. It lets them explore power dynamics and vulnerability in a space where everyone feels safe. But without clear boundaries and agreed-upon consent, these same actions can quickly become harmful, even dangerous. This is why BDSM rules like SSC, RACK, etc. are cornerstones of the entire community.

YouTube / Evie Lupine

Whether it’s the thrill of stepping into the taboo, the release found in giving up control, or the closeness built on absolute trust, what pulls people into these scenarios is incredibly varied. But how do you tread these waters safely and with enjoyment?

  • Approaching with openness and curiosity
  • Embracing empathy for yourself and your partners
  • Communicating clearly and regularly

Whether you’re just dipping your toes into BDSM or you’ve been exploring this world for years, understanding the emotional and psychological layers of these practices can deeply enrich your experiences, leading to more meaningful connections and even self-acceptance.

BDSM, in any aspect, asks us to:

  • Understand our own and our partners’ boundaries
  • Build everything on a foundation of trust and consent
  • Commit to ongoing communication and aftercare

For Example

Being asked to wear something specific that feels out of character in public. A discreet but unusual accessory can be a light form of humiliation for some. For others, acting out a role where they’re treated as ‘less than’ or made to perform tasks that challenge their self-view pushes them deeper into the realm of degradation.

Unleashing Desire: Top Ideas for BDSM Humiliation & Degradation


Some of these might be specific to men or women, but there’s a lot of crossover. Also, there are many that could be in more than one category. Don’t let this list narrow your creativity. It’s merely inspiration to help you find something that works for everyone involved (even if it’s solo play!)

The Body Speaks: Physical Acts of BDSM Humiliation

bdsm slave humiliation, toilet punishment, empty roll of toilet paper with "uh oh" on it
Credit: Source Unknown

  1. Forced Cross-Dressing: Dare your sub to wear lingerie under their clothes on a regular day out, even to work. It’s a secret thrill, a fun way to break the routine, and add giddy excitement. It’s not just about clothes but stepping out of the comfort zone and pushing boundaries without anyone else knowing. “John” loves wearing a pink, frilly thong under his business suit. Yummy.
  2. Commando Challenge: Order them to go outside without wearing any underwear beneath their clothes.
  3. Outdoor Bondage Challenge: Try tying someone up outdoors, maybe in a secluded part of your backyard or a private spot in nature. It’s about feeling exposed and yet safe within the boundaries you’ve set. Imagine them tied to a tree, the thrill of vulnerability pulsating with every rustle of leaves, blending the rush of exposure with the serenity of nature.
  4. Hair Removal: Delve into the realm of complete hairlessness with your submissive. Experiment with different methods such as shaving, waxing, or even laser hair removal for a variety of sensations. I can promise, from experience, that the zap of a laser isn’t for low pain tolerances.
  5. Pee Seating Protocol: Change traditional bathroom habits by instituting a new rule: he must pee sitting down. Obedience and vulnerability on one side and amusement on the other.
  6. Drool Drama: Strap on an O-ring gag and watch as speech becomes a slippery challenge. Whether it’s for punishment or pleasure, this “gag” is sure to leave a lasting impression.
  7. Semen Surprise: Add semen into food or as a topping, then make them consume it. Did you know there are actual cum cookbooks?

sperm cookbook
semen-based cookbook
cooking with semen book
  1. Nail Polish for Newbies: Try starting with subtle shades like nude or light pink and then gradually get into harder shades (like red, black, or anything intense). It’s not just about the color, it adds creativity and growth. And, if they get really good, they can do manicures and pedicures for their dominant!
  2. Bowl Bound: Try serving their food in a pet bowl for a quirky twist on mealtime. It’s a playful experience that reinforces your dynamic. Experiment with different types of bowls, maybe even personalized ones with their name engraved on them.
  3. Golden Goblet: Ever thought about spicing things up with a little golden shower action? Have them sip your pee, starting slow and building up. It’s a gradual journey of trust and submission that can be surprisingly intimate.
  4. Bathroom Banter: Keep the bathroom door open and make fun of the sights and sounds of their bodily functions. You could even turn it into a game, like bathroom bingo, where points are scored for certain noises.
  5. Silent Submission: Communicate with grunts and gestures. Get creative with signals and see how much can be conveyed without saying a word. It could also develop into an intimate, secret language between Dom and sub.
  6. Diaper Discipline: From cute patterns to embarrassing designs, there’s a diaper out there for every occasion. Not to mention it ties in with lots of other kinks, scenes, etc.

bdsm humiliation, woman dressed in pony bdsm gear
Credit: Source Unknown

  1. Animal Antics: Let your sub explore their wild side by dressing and behaving like an animal. They could crawl around on all fours, fetch objects for you, or even “beg” for treats. You could have them wear animal ears and a tail while following simple commands.
  2. Maid Mayhem: Transform your sub into a sultry French maid and put them to work cleaning. Consider adding extra humiliation by making them clean particularly dirty or difficult-to-reach areas, such as scrubbing the floor on their hands and knees or dusting high shelves while wearing a frilly apron … and little else.
  3. Sloppy Snacks: Get messy by covering them in pudding or other sloppy foods. Have them eat off their own body or lick the food off your fingers as a form of servitude.
  4. Golden Shower Games: Try urinating on your sub and making them “wear” it for a while before cleaning up. Remember to start slow – a few spots here and then, then level up.
  5. Floor Feasting: Challenge your sub to eat their meals off the floor, adding a touch of degradation to their dining experience. You could make it a ritual by having them kneel or lie down while you feed them spoon by spoon, lick bits off the floor, flick it into their mouth, baby bird feed them, etc
  6. Dress Dictation: Implement a strict dress code for them to follow. Choose outfits that amplify their vulnerability or discomfort.
  7. Embarrassing Evidence: Capture unflattering or embarrassing photos or videos of them. Remember to respect their privacy by letting them keep the only copy.

Poll: Find Out What Other Doms Are Thinking

  1. Spit Spectacle: Slathering saliva on your sub, whether as a punishment or a form of erotic degradation. You could make it a ritual during scenes of dominance and submission, using spit to assert your authority.
  2. Chastity Cages: Make them wear a chastity belt under their clothes when they head to the office. Or, try other places like home, during social outings, or while running errands.
  3. Chastity Challenge: Roll the dice to determine how long your sub must go without orgasm, embracing the uncertainty and anticipation of forced chastity. Consider using a chastity device to restrict their ability to achieve orgasm. It can also be highly arousing! There are a ton of other chastity games you can try as well.
  4. Floor Dwelling: Make sleeping on the floor the new norm, reinforcing status even during moments of rest. Provide them with a simple mat or blanket to sleep on – But remember to keep them warm and safe.
  5. Desk Detention: Make them sit beside your home desk while you work where they serve as your loyal assistant or silent observer. You could use this time to give them tasks to complete, such as organizing your desk or fetching items for you. Never get your own coffee ever again 🙂
  6. Spanking Sensation: Embrace the timeless art of spanking as a form of punishment, pleasure, or simply to spice up your playtime. Experiment with different spanking tools, techniques, and intensities to find what resonates most with you and your partner.

Tips for Safe Spanking

BDSM spanking safety chart
Credit: Unknown Source

Spanking Tool Ideas:

  • Paddle: It’s like the classic spanking tool you see in movies, but you can find them in wood, leather, or silicone, each giving a different feel.
  • Flogger: This one’s got a bunch of tails attached to a handle, so you can get all kinds of sensations based on what it’s made of and how hard you swing it.
  • Crop: Imagine a flexible stick with a little wide loop at the end. It’s perfect for delivering sharp, stingy spanks exactly where you want them.
  • Belt: You’ve probably seen this one in a few movies too. It’s straightforward and gives a solid thud when it lands, whether you’re playing around or being a bit more serious.
  • Hand: Sometimes, simplicity is best. Your hand gives you that personal touch and lets you feel exactly how hard you’re spanking.
  • Hairbrush: Grab a sturdy hairbrush with a flat surface, and you’ve got yourself a spanking tool. It might sound strange, but it packs a satisfying sting.
  • Cane: This one’s a bit more intense. Canes are known for their sharp sting and come in different materials like rattan or bamboo.
  • Riding Crop: If you want to add some drama to your spanks, try a riding crop. It’s longer than a regular crop and makes a satisfying snap.
  • Slapper: Picture a paddle but with a wider surface area. It delivers a solid thud and sounds pretty satisfying too.
  • Tawse: This one’s a bit old-school, like something out of a Scottish classroom. It’s got a split leather strap that delivers a sharp, stinging sensation.
YouTube / Watts The Safeword
  1. Routine Rituals: Implement simple tasks like kneeling or reciting phrases. Start with easy commands like “fetch” or “kneel,” then introduce more challenging tasks like “serve a meal” or “perform a dance routine.”
  2. Trash Treat: Turn them into a human ashtray. Start with simple items like used tissues or paper scraps, then progress to more degrading objects like discarded food wrappers or empty containers.
  3. Yucky Yummies: Make them eat foods they hate. Mix despised foods with small amounts of favorites to make them more bearable. Experiment with unpleasant combinations like squid and peanut butter for added humiliation.
  4. Ashes Away: Flick cigarette ashes on them or use them as an ashtray during playtime. Make sure to watch out for and care for any burns! For beginners, put the ash into a container first then use them.
  5. Enema Expedition: Try carrying out a thorough enema. Experiment with volume and ingredients to intensify the sensation. Always do your research for safety!
  6. Pay Piggy: Transform them into a pay pig and make them foot the bill for everything you desire. Make them carry your shopping bags while walking behind you with their eyes down. You’ll look like a bad add boss!
  7. Cavity Check: Get physical and give them an intense cavity check. Add in role-play scenarios for another layer of fun and humiliation.
“Let’s dance on the edge of taboo, where degradation meets desire. Wrap me in your words, adorn me with your commands, and watch as I bloom beneath your touch. Humiliation becomes artistry, and I am your masterpiece, waiting to be unveiled.” ~ unknown
  1. Utensil Uniqueness: Make them eat with unusual utensils to add a quirky twist to mealtime and will leave the Dom in stitches. Don’t be afraid to get creative. Eg. Chopsticks made of clothespins or straws instead of forks.
  2. No Peeking: Enforce a rule of no eye contact to assert your dominance. This is especially powerful when mixed with other kinds of humiliation.
  3. Gender Swap: Use the opposite of their preferred gender title during playtime. Take it further by incorporating scenarios that explore different gender identities.
  4. Army Adventure: Go army and have them scrub your floor with a toothbrush. Add a competitive element by timing them or turning it into a race against the clock.
  5. Gross Guzzle: Make them drink disgusting concoctions. Experiment with different ingredients and textures, gradually increasing the intensity. Be wary of allergies and follow the SCC rules!
  6. Oral Obedience: Try forced oral sex or other sexual gratification. Mix in verbal commands and cues that revolve around degradation etc.
  7. Soapy Situation: Wash their mouth with soap. Make sure they don’t swallow anything. Use half or small bars to be safe.

Mind Games: Navigating the Maze of Mental Humiliation

man with no shirt sitting against wall
Credit: Source Unknown

  1. Naked Outing Dare: Challenge them to go out without any underwear. Choose tight or see-through clothes to make them feel more self-conscious about their lack of undergarments.
  2. Office Chastity: Make them wear a belt under their clothes. Make sure the belt is visible to add embarrassment.
  3. Blushing Blog: Have them create a blog detailing their most humiliating experiences. They should write candidly and vividly about their shame-inducing moments.
  4. Off-Key Singing: Task them with singing a difficult song and critique their performance. Choose songs with difficult or suggestive lyrics/themes to play up their discomfort.
  5. Model Comparison Game: Look through magazines and compare them to idealized models. Point out flaws in the sub and how they’re not as good-looking as what’s on the page.
  6. Taboo Porn Exploration: Watch unconventional porn genres together and discuss what arouses them. Pick obscure or taboo categories to push their limits. Can we say tentacle porn?
  7. Embarrassing Video Playback: Film embarrassing moments and make them watch. Try adding humiliating challenges, games, events for even more fun.
“Humiliation in BDSM: Where ‘I dare you’ meets ‘Oh, please do.'” – Anonymous
  1. Tough Feedback: Give them a challenging task and point out every mistake in detail. Use strong words to highlight their incompetence.
  2. Heel Mockery: Make them wear high heels and laugh at their clumsy steps. Start with simple tasks and escalate to more embarrassing challenges. Awkward, sexy dancing is always fun.
  3. Personal Rebuke: Criticize their errors hard, in a way that hits home. Use specific examples of their weaknesses to make the criticism sharper.
  4. Intellectual Jabs: Ridicule their intelligence or belittle their achievements. Aim for areas where they are particularly sensitive or proud.
  5. Public Shame: Have them hold a sign with an embarrassing message in a busy area. Make sure that the sign isn’t going to offend or make anyone uncomfortable. “I sleep with a rainbow unicorn stuffie” or “I don’t cut my toenails” is a good balance and keeps things consensual all around.
  6. Complete Ignorance: Ignore them completely, denying them any attention.
  7. Choice of Humiliation: Let them choose their own humiliating task. Have them come up with creative and embarrassing ideas and anything that’s not good enough earns an extra humiliation tactic.
  8. Blackmail Play: Roleplay scenarios of consensual blackmail for added excitement. This is roleplay only! Real blackmail is illegal.
  9. Permission Protocol: Make them ask for permission for every action. Try changing the wording to be humiliating as well. Instead of “Maybe I go to the bathroom” it could be “May I please go peepee in the craper.”
  10. Humiliating Homework: Assign them a humiliating writing task, like a sexually explicit essay. For more ideas, try using writing prompt generators and tweak them to be more BDSM-themed.

In Plain Sight: The Thrill of “Public” Humiliation

bdsm public humiliation, man taped to power box with dildo on his head
Credit: rallitox.org

  1. Grocery Store Errand: Tell them to head to the store and grab the biggest cucumber or eggplant they can find, along with a bottle of lube.porn magazines, and whatever other embarrassing items that pop up in your beautifully twisted mind. Also, make them choose the busiest aisle.
  2. Bikini Tanning: Make them tan in a bikini and get lots of tan lines. Pick outfits that really push their comfort zone and emphasize their vulnerability.
  3. Funny Outfits: Make them wear silly clothes out in public, maybe even at a place like Wal-Mart where you’ll see plenty of other crazy outfits that will spark inspiration for other shopping trips.
  4. Scent Switch: Make them wear girly deodorant or perfume, or guy’s cologne. Choose scents that are strongly associated with traditional gender roles and apply liberally so it’s really noticeable.
  5. Social Media Shenanigans: Get them to post stuff on their social media that fits your game. Make sure they’re in a safe space when they do it and that the content aligns with their boundaries and comfort level. Suggest they use hashtags or captions that play up the embarrassment, inviting comments and engagement that ups the humiliation.
  6. Embarrassing Confession: Make them admit something embarrassing to someone, and then tell the news to others. Try choosing a confession that challenges their ego and highlights their vulnerability.
  7. Public Blunder: Make them confess a “mistake” to a stranger. They should also express genuine remorse and humiliation during the confession. And why nt film it for extra fun!
  8. Remote-Controlled Toy: Stick a smartphone-controlled sex toy up their bum/vagina and ramp up the vibrations when they’re out and about. Play around with different settings and timings for the best effect, keeping them on edge and uncertain about when they’re knees will buckle.

Places like sex clubs, BDSM gatherings, private gatherings of kinky friends, kink festivals, private property (no trespassing), etc. are the only places you can/should perform acts of H/D in front of other people. Even then you have to stay within the rules of whatever place you’re in. Why?
Because strangers walking down the street – vanilla or otherwise – are not able (or might not want to) consent to see it. Forcing someone to do this (e.g. by parading your sub naked down the street) breaks the SSC rule (not to mention legal ones) and therefore is a form of abuse. You also must consider there could be younger, impressionable eyes about. BDSM is already very misrepresented. Kink acts in public further damage the community’s reputation.

  1. Cage Display: Lock them in a cage and put them on display. Sex clubs and dungeons are perfect. Note: This is NOT for actual public view – consenting kinksters only.
  2. Embarrassing Prop: Have them carry around a humiliating object like a sex toy, doll, or dirty magazine while out in public. Make sure they keep eye contact with everyone passing by. If it’s in actual public, remember to make the items embarrassing but vanilla-friendly.
  3. Shopping Spree: Send them on a store scavenger hunt with a list of embarrassing products to purchase. Make them interact with staff as they complete their shopping list. This is a gamification version of the regular “grocery store errand.”
  4. Photo Booth Fun: Have them complete a list of embarrassing poses and actions in a photo booth. For safety, stand in front of the curtain so there’s no chance of public seeing (depending on the poses, you could get in a lot of trouble). Even better if it’s a booth that’s out of the way. It will still be plenty humiliating.
  5. Lipstick Smear: Put lipstick on them and make them go out in public. Choose a bold and noticeable color – things like purple, blue, green, etc.
  6. Fake Pee Stain: Pour water on the crotch of their pants to make it look like they’ve peed themselves, then take them for a walk outside.
  7. Live Webcam Show: Make them give a live webcam show for your entertainment. Remember to protect their privacy if that’s on their list of limits. Masks and covering distinguishing markets with makeup will help.

red bdsm collar with lock and degrading name customization
Credit: Etsy – You can try personalized collars and locks for added fun!

  1. Paper Bag Mask: Make them wear a paper bag over their head with eye holes cut out. Added bonus, write something on it like “dunce” or “idiot” etc.
  2. Dinner Orders: Take charge of ordering for them when you go out for dinner. Make sure they maintain a submissive demeanor and defer to your decisions throughout the meal, reinforcing their role as your submissive.
  3. Cute Hairdo: Give them a cute and girly hairdo complete with sparkles, bows, and ribbons. There are lots of YouTube videos for help with styling.
  4. Social Media Alterations: Make changes to their social media details to reflect your dynamic and their role as your submissive. Customize their profile with new descriptions or photos. Never do this with professional sites or anywhere their privacy would be violated.
  5. Walking Position: Make them always walk behind you as a sign of their submission and obedience. Add in vanilla-public-friendly punishments if they misstep.
  6. Business Trip Embarrassment: If they’re on a business trip, make them leave embarrassing items out around the room for housekeeping or colleagues to find. Choose items that target their professionalism and dignity. Don’t forget to document reactions!
  7. Bell Collar: Add a bell to their collar to draw attention to their presence as your submissive. Larger bells will make more noise!

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Intimate Power Play: The Art of Sexual Humiliation

erotic humilation, sexual humiliation, sexy woman sitting on man pulling his tie
Credit: Source Unknown

  1. Rimming Roleplay: Make them perform rimming on you or another person as a form of sexual submission. Add other ideas from this list, like name-calling, clothing, etc. to add another layer of blush.
  2. Sexual Sharing: Share them sexually with other kinksters to explore their exhibitionist and submissive side.
  3. Awkward Jerking: Make them perform awkward or strange masturbation methods, such as humping a stuffed animal or into food while adding mean comments, edging, video, or limits on their orgasm.
  4. Orgasm Control: Have them ask for permission before masturbating or orgasms. This might not seem humiliating but it depends on the person. It’s a good one for beginners.
  5. Pegging Punishment: Peg them like the whore they are. Remember to start with smaller toys and plenty of lubrication if they’re new to the act.
  6. Exhibitionist Encounters: Have sex with them near a window with the blinds open, inviting potential adult viewers to witness their submission and obedience. Choose a location and time when the risk of exposure to non-consenting individuals is minimal. No one wants the cops knocking at your door. A safer alternative is having them dressed in something awkward or over the top. It’s a great way to dip your toe into the shallow end of the pool while staying legal.

safe dildo materials
Credit: healthline.com

  1. Erotic Fanfiction: Make them write and read fan erotic while also acting out the scenes. If it’s a weird genre that turns them on, even better!
  2. Cum Consumption: Make them eat their own cum – but always remember to be up to date on STI tests. Use verbal degradation and humiliation to intensify the moment.
  3. Sex Doll Submission: Give them to others to use as a sex doll. This is different from just having sex with others because it’s more in the degradation sphere. By adding makeup and slutty clothes, or even latex suits that make people look like actual sex dolls, they’ll really feel like objects.
  4. Dildo Sucking: Make them suck on dildos or other sex toys, especially weird or unconventional ones like tentacles. Extra points for practicing deep-throating, wide toys that barely fit, or versions that attach to the face with a harness.
  5. Genital Exposure: Subject them to situations that leave their private bits exposed. Add verbal commands and physical restraints to maintain control.
  6. Sex Furniture: Place them in sex furniture or equipment in an embarrassing position. Invite others to use them. This is a twist on just lending them out for sex because you’re adding a new element into the mix. You can add bondage, writing on their bodies, etc. There are a ton of sex furniture options – you’ll be spoiled for choice!

Words That Wound: Mastering the Craft of Verbal Humiliation

public humiliation, Dominatrix and submissive on the street
Credit: Wikimedia Commons

  1. Phallic Humiliation: Make fun of their penis, using derogatory terms like small, worthless, or flaccid to degrade and emasculate them
  2. Scolding Session: Scold them in a way that resonates with their insecurities and vulnerabilities when they’ve done something wrong. You can also learn what words were used on them when they were younger that they hated.
  3. Intellectual Insults: Insult their intelligence or accomplishments as a form of psychological degradation and humiliation. Use specific examples or comparisons to highlight their perceived flaws. Things like, “You’re an idiot” are too general. “You’re a goddamn moron for making these typing mistakes in your report. No wonder you’ve never got a promotion.” See the difference?
  4. Degrading Nicknames: there are names like bitch, slut, or whore. But it will hit home harder if it’s something that really targets them. It’s different than just calling them names during scenes because it’s a word or term you’ll use regularly.
  5. Belittling Descriptions: Belittling nicknames or descriptions are different but also useful. Things like child, boy, girl, girly, needy, sissy, wimp, etc.
  6. Begging Requirement: Make them beg like the slut they are for something they want or need. Withhold or delay gratification. It can be anything from getting up from a chair to changing their clothes.
  7. Body Critique: Criticize the shape, size, or appearance of a specific body part, intensifying their feelings of inadequacy and insecurity. Careful of trauma or triggers.
  8. Animalistic Descriptions: Describe them as an animal to degrade and dehumanize them. Some examples include pony-boy/girl, puppy, doggo, piggy, rover, donkey, ass, fuckbunny, etc.
  9. Demeaning Pronouns: Don’t let them use personal pronouns like “I” and instead refer to them with demeaning titles like “this slut.”
  10. Witnessing Inferiority: Make them watch you have sex with someone else and tell them how they’ll never measure up, or other targeting words.
  11. Verbal Worship Requirement: Have them verbally worship you, insulting them if their worship falls short of your expectations.

Harnessing the Heat: Practical Ways to Use BDSM Humiliation


humiliation in bdsm, man in medieval stocks, bdsm degradation

Slave Training:

  • Rituals: These are like secret codes that reinforce the power exchange. From acts of service to special rituals, they’re like the glue that binds the dynamic, making it all feel more intense and meaningful.
  • Goal-Oriented: Just like hitting the gym, BDSM training might have goals like becoming more obedient, enduring more, or just serving better. It’s all about growth and achievement within the kinky dynamic.

Punishments:

  • Understanding Limits: Knowing your partner’s boundaries is key. You can’t just throw any old punishment their way and expect it to work. It’s all about finding that sweet spot where discipline meets desire.
  • Consent and Communication: BDSM is all about talking things out. Before you throw down any punishment involving humiliation or degradation, you gotta make sure everyone’s on the same page. It’s all about trust and understanding.

bdsm punishment and reward card
Credit: Punishment & Reward Chart (BDSM) / Etsy

Pleasure:

  • Exploring Taboos: BDSM is like a judgment-free zone for exploring all your wildest fantasies. Whether it’s humiliation, degradation, or something even wilder, as long as it’s consensual, it’s fair game.
  • Embracing Vulnerability: Surrendering control and embracing vulnerability is part of the thrill in BDSM. It’s like jumping into the deep end and trusting your partner to catch you. It’s intense, but that’s what makes it so damn hot.

BDSM Games:

  • Reward and Punishment: Sometimes, a little carrot and stick action is needed. BDSM games can be used to reward good behavior or punish disobedience. It’s all about keeping things fun and keeping everyone in line.
  • Building Trust: Trust is the foundation of any BDSM relationship. By navigating challenges together, you deepen your bond and strengthen your connection. It’s like building a fortress of trust brick by kinky brick.

The Golden Rules of BDSM Play


bdsm humiliation safety, safety first warning road sign

  1. Pre-Scene Chat:
    • Before you dive into the kinky stuff, make sure you’re both on the same page. Discuss what’s on the table and what’s off-limits. It’s like drawing up a game plan before a big match – you wanna know the rules so nobody gets hurt.
  2. Aiming for Good Times:
    • Remember, BDSM is all about mutual enjoyment. Whether you’re aiming to correct behavior or explore new frontiers, the endgame is a good time for everyone involved. Keep it light, keep it fun!
  3. Keeping Headspace Safe:
    • BDSM can get intense, but it should never mess with your head in a bad way. Doms, keep an eye on your sub’s vibe. If things start feeling off, it’s time to hit the brakes and check-in. Mental and emotional safety always comes first, always!
  4. Fair and Square Punishments:
    • When it’s time to dish out some discipline, keep it fair and square. Punishments should match the crime, so to speak. Think of it as a teaching moment rather than a trip to the principal’s office.
  5. Public Play and Privacy:
    • Public play can be a rush, but it’s not something you wanna shout from the rooftops. Keep things low-key and be mindful of your surroundings. Privacy is key to keeping the fun going without any unwanted interruptions.
  6. Playing it Safe in Bed:
    • Safety first, especially between the sheets. Use protection, get tested regularly, and choose partners you trust. It’s all about keeping things hot while staying safe and sound.
  7. Respect for Personal Lives:
    • BDSM is a bedroom thing, not a 24/7 gig (usually). Doms, make sure your sub’s personal life stays just that – personal. Keep things under wraps if needed and respect boundaries outside of the playroom.

For more, you can read about SCC, RACK, and PRICK rules here.

bdsm vs abuse table
Credit: Source Unknown

Any other BDSM humiliation ideas? Share in the comments!

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88 comments

Penny 02/19/2023 - 8:19 pm

My husband is my daddy. Humiliation is the only thing that keeps me obedient. He spanks me in public. He makes me wear a diaper on long trips and changes me in the men’s room. He makes me eat out of his hand. That not punishment. That’s just us.

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Deviant Dave 11/28/2020 - 12:00 am

Male slave, complete depilation from the nose down. Tiny chastity with catheter that he can unscrew to pee, but keeps there from being a mess like some devices. Crotchless panties and an inflatable butt plug. Chores, guests, her dates, dates for him (men), etc. You decide.

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PropertyOfHelen 11/14/2020 - 12:00 am

My Dom would eat a bowl of chili and drink a coffee then tie me up in a sleeping bag, then get in the sleeping bag and zip it up around her hips, so My face was right behind her ass sealed in the sleeping bag, then she would gas me with farts for hours at they were so thick that I almost suffocated.

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Dumb 11/05/2020 - 12:00 am

I fantasized this too

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Fuckoff 10/15/2020 - 12:00 am

Lol so bitchey

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beauty {M} 09/05/2020 - 12:00 am

my Domme does not let me cum often. if She does, she collects and freezes it. when She has lots, she thaws it, takes a turkey baster and injects it all in my ass. then Wwe take a walk in public with me going commando. the longer the walk, the more cum oozes out of my ass down my pants.

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Oz Sub 07/30/2020 - 12:00 am

Clones your cock using the clone your Willy toy. Then she milks you’re prostate using a replica of your own cock

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Oz Sub 07/30/2020 - 12:00 am

Tied up then she teases cock, denying orgasm. If the sub makes too much noise she gags you with her worn panties.

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Little Greame 06/25/2020 - 12:00 am

Wife locked me in the spare bedroom in nappies whenever she slept with one of her lovers. Lately she makes me wear them inside the house to remind me her boyfriends are bigger and better than me. I always know if she is expecting company all night when she puts plastic pants over my nappy.

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Nate 07/11/2020 - 12:00 am

I like this as a fantasy. In reality, it seems like the wife doesnt feel loved if you get too passive. Also, I feel its not good to lose respect from your wife. I would at least set boundaries to where this is allowed only once every thre months or something.

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Deviant Dave 11/28/2020 - 12:00 am

sounds like you need a cock shaped pacifier and have to wear it when her men are coming over. She should hide it and give you an hour to find it, if you dont by the time her date gets there maybe they can think of something to use as a substitute.

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3LeggedSexKitten 05/28/2020 - 12:00 am

She had me climb up and sit at the top of the slide on the playground in the park.I was instructed to piss through my jeans onto the slide then slide down repeatedly until it was dry. Then I was told to wipe down the whole structure with disinfectant wipes. !!No children were present!!

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rich 05/28/2020 - 12:00 am

shes having me wear a plug and panties out on a hike and take pics and vid to prove it

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carlos 05/09/2020 - 12:00 am

mi pareja me castiga atando mis manos a mi espalda y desnudo tirado en el piso, orina sobre mi cara, me hace tragar su orina toda, una vez está limpio escupe sobre sus pies y debo igual dejarlos totalmente limpios, me siento profundamente humillado en el momento, pero después lo disfruto.

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julio 06/20/2020 - 12:00 am

Woah amigo, cálmate

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Master Luke 05/05/2020 - 12:00 am

Take get to a glory hole and video her sucking strangers cocks.

Whole shes doing it, use a vibrator on her so she enjoys it all, then shell get in her mind that she enjoys pleasuring men in glory holes.

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Marcy 05/19/2020 - 12:00 am

My Master has done this to me and it was humiliating and a turn on at the same time. He made video of it and then played it in front of guests

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rj 05/28/2020 - 12:00 am

that works for both

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nick vegas 05/03/2020 - 12:00 am

Interesting that some found these to be too much, I found them too tame. But then again in the twisted erotica I write, its all fantasy. 99% of what I write is girl/girl, but one girl has to be brought into it, usually as a comeuppance for disrespect, only to end up the other womans submissive.

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puppy 09/15/2020 - 12:00 am

what’s it called and where can i find it

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ChubbyChaser247 04/21/2020 - 12:00 am

I genuinely love and adore large fat woman a lot. But, i enjoy treating them as if i am not attracted to them or as if they disgust me. I enjoy taking my fat female property shopping and have her try on clothes that are way too small for her… and having the staff give their opinion on her look.

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A bitch 04/20/2020 - 12:00 am

During my punishment my master order me to be naked and then he puts automatic nipple suction on me.Place a vibrator in my vagina and butt plug. A neck collar and leash.Then he ask me to stand on four like a bitch and then he uses me like a foot rest. Usually for one hour.i lick masters foot during

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Master Mari 04/15/2020 - 12:00 am

This works for both males and females.

Have the sub get on their hands and knees and kneel behind them. Put your hand between their legs and pleasure them. Everytime they make any noise you’ll spank their ass harder and harder each time.

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Little 03/13/2020 - 12:00 am

Give your man sub a bj and before hes about to cum let him call his mother 😉

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Masters Toy 02/16/2020 - 12:00 am

Make her take off the underwear she wore that day, and gag her with it.

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Seeking female sub 02/15/2020 - 12:00 am

Number 25 i wonder if that can be use on female sub

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Starrose6988 02/20/2020 - 12:00 am

Doing it now on mine, think she needs punished for taking back though.

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Y1KES 01/20/2020 - 12:00 am

Lately my Girlfriend has started taking more and more control. It started when she found out about queening. After I had taken care of her she would only let me jerk on her panties. Lately she has been taking me in hand. She is loving and kind but has been in charge in the bedroom more and more.

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Master M 12/27/2019 - 12:00 am

Make your slave masturbate into a cup, freeze it. Then make them continue to add cum for month. When full, defrost the cup of cum. Time them for how long it takes to drink the entire cup of their cum. For every second it takes they get spanked by paddle.

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Masters Toy 02/16/2020 - 12:00 am

Turned on by just thinking about this. Gonna save this one.

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Oudo 11/30/2019 - 12:00 am

Video your sub masturbating and insult them. Make them watch the videos while they masturbate. Turn them into their own porno until they get off looking at themselves.

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Cumslut 03/18/2020 - 12:00 am

That’s hot !

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PudPounder 11/30/2019 - 12:00 am

Use screen mirrroring on your phone to your smart TV. Point phone at subs asshole. Make sub masturbate to their own filthy fuck hole.

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Jake 06/04/2020 - 12:00 am

That is incredible. I love this idea.

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PudPounder 11/30/2019 - 12:00 am

Ejaculate on black clothing and make sub wear it in public like they don’t notice.

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PudPounder 11/30/2019 - 12:00 am

Deny man orgasm until he can make himself cum with a vibrator to the base of the penis like it was a clit. There after make it a rule that’s the only way he gets to cum. Laugh at him when he does. Show friends.

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Jim from Marketing 06/20/2020 - 12:00 am

no, no i dont think i will

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Not Jim from Marketing 06/20/2020 - 12:00 am

help me i am in great pain

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MeSlave 11/18/2019 - 12:00 am

Some of my ideas –
1. Go to Mcdonalds and buy burger and coke. Master eats a piece of it and then spits it out and makes the slave eat it.

2. Master takes the coke to the washroom and mixes it with piss and then comes out and make the slave drink it … every1 will think slave is drinking coke.

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Cindyslave2 11/15/2019 - 12:00 am

When pissing have male lift it’s leg by a tree then sniff the piss
Take male slave shopping have it try on clothes in dressing room and then come out to show you if someone is near ask their opinion on how your slut looks

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Gene 06/07/2020 - 12:00 am

This was done to me at Victoria’s Secret. I was given a dressing room, told to get naked and stand there waiting. Mistress and sales associate returned, She kept the door open, instructing every action while the Associate and passerby’s watched. The two went back/forth several x’s.

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topgun 11/10/2019 - 12:00 am

Have male kiss your 2 or 3 week worn nylon feet or 2 or 3 week worn panties . Have them remove those panties and turn them inside out and put them back on you ( best if you have peed in them several times) then have them go at your pussy licking thru those panties.

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Subby 03/18/2020 - 12:00 am

That’s totally hop

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p 10/27/2019 - 12:00 am

Dress a male sub up as an adult schoolboy or Little Lord Fauntleroy, have him do your shopping and give him a list of tasks at the mall. If questioned, he can pretend he is going to a school reunion, but he might not be believed. Watch him from a distance.

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Kinkster 10/17/2019 - 12:00 am

Make you get in a cage outside and be forced to masturbate in front of other Doms and have them insult you and call you slut, whore, etc. and how you are disgusting and worthless and how you are only good for their pleasure. SO HOT!

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Faggot hubby 10/16/2019 - 12:00 am

I cant wait to show these to my master! THANK YOU!

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TheUltimatePunisher 10/14/2019 - 12:00 am

Tie them down and get a leg spread bar to keep thier legs open then get a massive dildo with a rope attached to it and shove it up tbier ass with the rope outside spank thier ass hard if they try to push the dildo out attach a noise activated shock collar to thier neck on a stand able safe voltage

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Masters Toy 02/16/2020 - 12:00 am

That sounds hot.

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SupremePunisher 09/17/2020 - 12:00 am

Then what will you do next after that Ultimate Punisher??

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Bitch Frannie 09/16/2019 - 12:00 am

Make the sub male jerk off but it has to tell you when it’s about to cum then make it stop. If even a drop of cum shows then it get it’s hands and feet cuffed and my biggest dildo lubed with Ben Gay shoved up it’s ass and duct taped in while I watch tv with it as my footrest

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Subslut 09/25/2019 - 12:00 am

I wish that could be me

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Jdom 12/12/2020 - 12:00 am

U can be

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BDSM lover 08/13/2019 - 12:00 am

The submissive is required to have sex with a b!ow up doll or one of those blow up sheep/pig for the amusement of the dominant, her bull and maybe some of her friends.
Submissive has to wear his wifes /doms wet knickers after she has had sex, so the sub can feel how a real man can please her.

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Succulent Savage Says 08/26/2019 - 12:00 am

Hmmmm…. gave me all kinds of fun ideas there. Thanks!

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BDSM lover 08/13/2019 - 12:00 am

The Dom, (female) takes her underwear off and has the sub push his face into the gusset and has to hold them against the wall no hands with his nose, the sub is to be completely naked.
The dom will have sex with a superior male whilst the sub listens. If the panties drop there will be a punishment.

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Joe Dirt 09/11/2020 - 12:00 am

This is a great idea. It would work for a female sub as well. Make her hold her panties in the wall while punishing her and commenting on the smell of her sex in the panties. Idk Im really kinda nee at this.

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lovebigdirtyfeet 08/03/2019 - 12:00 am

Make a male slave get naked and on the floor on all fours with his legs spread and its balls dangling and hanging low..then have at least two dommes or more with big dirty bare feet ..line up behind the ballbusting pig and each take turns kicking the slave in the balls.

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1Nut 02/14/2020 - 12:00 am

Be very careful with BallBusting! Im currently recovering from having a unilateral orchiectomy (RIP mr righty), doctors dont know what caused the swelling but believe it was likely from trauma in the area sometime in the last 6months. Not from ball busting but just be careful if abusing them!

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Mr Anderson 07/28/2019 - 12:00 am

You all strange

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Just a servant 07/14/2019 - 12:00 am

I know I always love it when my partner calls me names.. And makes me feel bad for liking the things he does.

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Slave 02/16/2020 - 12:00 am

I love being felt bad liking the things he does as well and he knows it.

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Slut 07/07/2019 - 12:00 am

pour water into her vagina and diaper her. tie her up in the back yard and then take photos 😉

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Shithead 08/12/2019 - 12:00 am

Having water inside the vagina can actually be quite harmful so be careful

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GoddessCandii 11/07/2019 - 12:00 am

Dude thats just stupid. Thays very dangerous not on a good way. Do some research.

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Twisted 10/29/2020 - 12:00 am

If your trying to make her pee herself. Instead of risking health issues by pouring water inher vagina. Have them drink a 1.5l bottle of water followed by an energy drink.

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Slaveio 05/19/2019 - 12:00 am

Lock him up into chastity for several days with proper teasing and edging and then u finally give them a handjob but the catch here is , apply numbing cream on the dick first ! I bet that frustration would be killer !

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WorthlessMaleWhore 05/17/2019 - 12:00 am

1) Make the slave eat left over food directly from the trash can. 2) Only allow the slave to pee in the garden (or outside in general) standing on all fours.

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Sluttysub 07/24/2019 - 12:00 am

Making the slave pee outside on all fours is hot buddy. Great idea
1)I like being told to do things while Im wearing whatever outfit was picked for me. 2) make your sub do all the yard work in heels and a skirt. Make them show off the outfit to impress then tell them its not good enough.

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Sandy 01/15/2020 - 12:00 am

These seem quite damaging to the mind. What if a sub/slaves isnt comfortable and feels humiliated that they get trust issues? Some acts mentioned above in the list of the article seems degrading for basic human rights. What if a slave feels he has no dignity in the relationship? Can they deny?

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robyn256 01/16/2020 - 12:00 am

All actions should be negotiated ahead of time. If someone forces a person to do something they are truly uncomfortable with, then it is no longer BDSM. Also, what turns one person off, might turn on someone else. It’s subjective (and therefore should be discussed in detail before play).

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Slut 04/01/2020 - 12:00 am

they can deny. dom-sub relationships normally have a safe word, something random like pineapple. If they want something to stop, they just need to say the safe word.

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J 05/03/2020 - 12:00 am

Of course. Thats why you have safe words. All parties need to consent at all times and all parties need be able to revoke that consent and stop at any time.

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Krissy 05/16/2020 - 12:00 am

Yes. Consent is king.

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Puppygirl69 12/05/2020 - 12:00 am

A sub can always use a safe word when they feel like its to much. If the Dom doesnt comply to the safe word then the sub should leave the relationship.

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Mommawolf0126 onlyfans Dom 12/19/2020 - 12:00 am

The sub and dom should have this convo before doing tasks or asking the sub whats to far the dom should know her subs limits before giving him tasks they are still human and have a say on the sexual acts they participate in

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slaveboy 02/23/2020 - 12:00 am

great idea

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SmallCockBitch 05/16/2019 - 12:00 am

Force him to ruin his own orgasm. Put him into Chastity and deny him from cumming for several weeks, if he fails to ruin it. Of course its only up to you to decide, if it was a successful ruination or not. I. E. At least 5 Dec between end of stimulation and ejaculation.

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Silky Slut 05/07/2019 - 12:00 am

Squirt an entire tube of KY jelly up their ass and then take them out for a nice walk. For more fun dont let them wear underwear or make a guy wear lacy panties.

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Whelia 04/27/2020 - 12:00 am

That is a good idea

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Fanta Goode 10/12/2020 - 12:00 am

Yessss

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GoddessAmy 11/14/2020 - 12:00 am

Love this idea

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Pie 05/02/2019 - 12:00 am

Make them perform some dance like twerk and record it. Later watch it with them and critique the performance.

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Bozo 03/25/2019 - 12:00 am

Well I have A HUGE clown fetish! And my bf knows how much I love clowns so he will force me to dress like one for punishment. He calls me bozo and he laughs at me and tells me I look like an idiot! He also loves pieing me with giant oversized shaving cream pies with crust!

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Silas 01/31/2019 - 12:00 am

1)Make them drink lots of water, take them for a long walk. Nature does the rest
2)Make them skip bathing for a few days
3)For women, poorly fitting clothing and bad makeup (clashing colors, wrong foundation for skin tone
4)Line the inside of her bra with sandpaper.

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Sandy 03/15/2020 - 12:00 am

If the slave/sub is not comfortable with a certain action, then a safs word must be used and the issue needs to he addressed with the dom. If the dom does not respect the submissives wishes, then they are no longer being a dom, they are being abusive. All actions NEED to be Consensual always

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Izzy 04/16/2020 - 12:00 am

Wow that sounds amazing

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Deviant Dave 11/28/2020 - 12:00 am

Lots of water is fine just dont overdo it. Too much can be dangerous, even deadly. However, it doesnt get a lot worse than wetting yourself in public without being totally disgusting.

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Pet 12/06/2020 - 12:00 am

Make me your slave

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